Self-Care, Self-indulgence, & Body Love

Let's talk self-care, self-indulgence, and body love. Before we start though let's start with some definitions.

Self-care noun taking action to preserve or improve one's own health. 1.1 The practice of taking an active role in protecting one's own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress.

Self-indulgence noun using instant gratification of one's desires, whims, and appetites. It's giving into the want instead of the need.

When I was younger, I was a huge believer in self-care. The only problem? I was using the term "self-care" to justify doing things that were not good for me. These were a few of my old go-to thoughts:

"I had a hard day at work, I deserve chocolate, wine, and a bubble bath." 

"I am too tired to exercise and besides I have been working on the floor all day."

"I just need to watch TV and not think for a while."

"I'm too tired to cook, I am going to grab something fast on the way home." 

Although I liked to call them "self-care" at that time in my life, I realize now these were indulgences that I used to help me avoid dealing with the real problem of being a burnt out and disliking my job.

Instead of confronting this, I turned to my vices, gained weight, and repeated the cycle.

Self-indulgences are not inherently bad, bu they are a horrible coping tool. In the short term you feel better, but there is not enough chocolate, wine, TV, take-out,or lazy days in the world that will take away a problem. 

 These little indulgences became weekly habits for me that I relied on to cope with my unhappiness. What finally knocked me out of it was a combination of moving halfway across the country to start a new life and coaching. Through coaching, I began to see how my indulgences don't make my life better and have worked against me.

One of my biggest learning is what self-care looks like for me. Self-care means taking care of my body and my mind.

These are a few of my self-care guidelines:

-Get at least 8 hours of sleep every night.

-Committing to my work-out schedule 5x weekly.

-Appreciate one thing every day about my body in the mirror.

-Eating meals that make me feel good.

-Keeping news/media exposure in moderation.

-Daily thought download and models.

-Keep my home clean and organized.

-Whenever I feel anxious, remind myself that I did the right thing at the right time.

-Avoiding activities that I do not enjoy and do not improve my personal growth.


So next time you are doing something for "self-care" reflect for a second and ask "Does this fuel me?" If it's not improving your life, is it worth your time? This list might align for some people but totally be different for others. Good luck on your journey to understanding what self-care means for you. :)